12. Our Culture Isn't Performative

Kia ora - This is a topic that has been on my mind recently.

I've spoken with many Australian-born Māori that LOVE their culture, and LOVE witnessing cultural expression. But there's often a level of anxiety and somewhat of an "identity crisis" based on how they see themselves in relation to kapahaka performances.

In short - the performance quality of our on-stage whanau can lead to people inadvertently feeling and thinking that in order "to be" Māori, there needs to be a level of performative competency, and that this would make them feel "more Māori".

Identity Feels Like a Performance

The pressure to be visibly “Māori” can be heavy, especially for those who didn’t grow up immersed in the reo or traditional customs (I know this for a FACT as I've met many of them!). 

For the Australian-born Māori that feels disconnected, seeing Te Matatini performances can instill a sense of identity crisis along the lines "if I can't do what they're doing, I'm not Māori enough". 

That pressure can stir up imposter syndrome, making people question their place just because they don’t fit a certain image.

A Living Connection

Māori culture isn’t something that’s just performed on a stage or pulled out for special occasions (although sometimes that's what it can inadvertently appear like when online).

It’s woven into the way many of us live how we relate to each other, how we care for our surroundings, and how we see our place in the world. Te Ao Māori is a rich, holistic way of being. It doesn't demand that you showcase your Māoritanga to prove it’s real.

Māori Identity: A Journey, Not a Checklist

Being Māori isn’t one fixed thing; it moves and grows with each person. It’s not about ticking boxes or doing things a certain way. What truly matters is the connection you carry to your whakapapa, your tīpuna, your whānau.

You don’t need to be fluent in te reo or know every karakia to stand in your identity. What matters most is how you honour where you’ve come from and how you carry those values forward. It’s about showing up for your people and your history in whatever ways are meaningful and possible for you 🙌.

Communities can sometimes add to the pressure by setting up narrow ideas of what being Māori looks like. That can lead to judgement or exclusion. But our culture is rooted in acceptance and diversity, and it makes space for all expressions of identity (whether you're a kapahaka pro or a complete newbie!).

Whakapapa is central to your identity. And that doesn’t shift depending on your fluency or how many protocols you know. Your connection runs deeper than that; it’s in your blood, your stories, your ties to those who walked before you.

If you feel like you don't have this, there's ALWAYS room and time to learn and grow into your identity.

How to Overcome the Pressure

1. Embrace Your Journey: Don’t compare yourself to others. Your connection to your culture is YOUR OWN, and it will grow and evolve over time. Allow yourself to learn, make mistakes, celebrate progress, and find comfort in the present.

2. Start with What You Can Do: If you don’t speak te reo Māori, you can still honor your culture in many ways. Start with small steps...maybe learning a few phrases, listening to Māori music, attending cultural events, or connecting with whānau and whenua (land). There’s no one “right” way to be Māori.

3. Seek Support and Connection: Find a community that encourages growth and self-expression, rather than one that focuses on perfection or performing culture. This could be through Māori language groups, kapa haka, iwi, or other ways of connecting with te ao Māori. Sometimes, just sharing in conversation with another Māori can massively uplift the spirit.

4. Deconstruct the “Performative” Narrative: Understand that Māori identity is not a performance. It’s about living authentically and with integrity. Be proud of the small steps you take, and remember that culture is something you live, not something you “perform.”

5. Teach and Share: If you have knowledge and connection to your culture, share it! Authenticity in teaching and guiding others can help break down the barriers of performativity, offering a space for real connection to thrive.

Pēpē Update 

The last 2 weeks have been very draining for our whanau. Baby is happy and healthy at home (with dad - me!), but mum has been recovering from a post-partum stomach issue and has only returned home from hospital this weekend - yes, 2 weeks in hospital!

I've had to wear the Dad and Mum hat for those 2 weeks, which has been tiring, fulfilling, and humbling. 

We are so grateful to have many supportive friends and whanau locally that have looked out for us - running errands for us, making meals, checking, and even sleeping over to help with baby through the night.

I've been able to get out of the house regularly and get plenty of sunshine and fresh air in...very blessed!

What a squishy-looking Māori face 😂

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Thanks for reading this week's Newsletter.

Mauri ora!

Grant Whitbourne - Te Whānau-a-Apanui